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1/12/04 ... Patrick's Brand New Bag
It's a good time to be a poet in Orlando, kids. In case you ain't read the home page, the original Backroom Words
is back at its once and future home of the Bodhisattva Social Club. Even cooler, you can still visit the spinoff
SpeakEasy nights on Tuesdays at Wills Pub! You are surrounded by spoken word ... so circle the wagons and get
writing already. We're comin' in.
1/23/03 ... Patrick takes pictures
Wow! As though there weren't enough to do at the job you're supposed to be working at, now we
have all sorts of pretty new pictures for you to ogle! See the scant photographic
evidence of an actual poetry scene in the Gulag of Mickey! And! AND! A new link as
well!! Shit, you'd think we were actually keeping up with the times over here!
1/6/03 ... New Year, New Night, New Name, Same Hangover
Change hurts, kids. We should know. After bouncing around like a gummi bear on a trampoline from night to night,
our beloved spoken word night mutates once again. Proceedings will now commence at 9:30 on TUESDAYS (not Mondays)
at everyone's favorite dive, Wills Pub. To further confuse everyone, the night will now be known as SpeakEasy.
Why? Most likely out of respect for the old host's departure ... and to throw off the scent of the authorities, who may
have heard the phrase "carpet-bomb the rich" one too many times at our readings. So why is the site still named for the
Backroom Words?!
Umm ... we're lazy? I dunno. Does it look like we know what we're doing?
11/26/02 ... Sex Type Thing
Like a bad venereal rash, it's back. New host Tod Caviness has shamelessly stolen one
of Patrick Scott Barnes' best ideas and re-instituted the dreaded THEME NIGHT!! Here's how this
works, kids: on the first Monday of each month, there will be a different 'theme' for that night.
December 2nd will be the first of these nights, and to kick things off, we're giving you a subject
everyone can get behind. (Or on top of, or side-saddle) Poets reading on that night are encouraged
to bring their best poems on the subject of ... SEX. That's right, SEX. It's hot. It sells. And it feels swell.
What can I say; we need the audience. So come on out next Monday, and be sure to wear protection ...
11/18/02 ... Back in Black - uh, I Mean White
Like a gangly teenager hitting puberty, the Backroom Words is going through all sorts of changes.
After a couple of weeks off following the departure of the mighty Patrick Scott Barnes, the night will
now be hosted by a skinny white guy. Foul play has been suspected, and fingers have been pointed at
the KKK, NOW, and the Young Republicans. New host Tod Caviness was unavailable for comment, but has
been spotted with a new wardrobe and several gold teeth.
10/30/02 ... Hot XXX Poets Want You
Awww yeah. You know you want it. Steaming dripping oozing Poet-on-Poet action available
at a click of the mouse right there on your screen! See free new hot photos of real live
Poets doing the literary nasty right here! Click now and receive
a free coupon for 10% off your next penis enlargement!
10/24/02 ... Whoops. Got lazy.
Normally Chad Robertson sends us a poem, and it's up like THAT. But no! You had to wait
two whole freakin' days. Two days! Can you forgive us? We deserve only your contempt.
Go to the words page while you contemplate our punishment.
10/22/02 ... A day that will live in obscurity
The words page crawls along through the desert of your day
with three new poems by Backroom Words sex kitten Dith! (She loves herself and you will too!)
Also, a short story by Tod in which he only cusses once. Read them all and be complete.
This just in ... The virus spreads!
Tod Caviness, resident web guy, haiku mangler, and, uh ... me - would like to announce that
he is the brand new host of an open mike night of his very own. Come down and say hi every Wednesday night at
Guinevere's coffeehouse downtown on the corner of Pine Street and Magnolia. Just don't make
any sudden moves, and for God's sake don't expect him to admit he knows you. See Tod ruin
a perfectly good evening of erudite music and literate snobbery!
9/27/02 ... Read the Backroom Words and give terrorism a kick in the ding-ding!
All right, to be honest, Osama couldn't give a wet fart about us. I just wanted to
use the words "Osama" and "terrorism" a couple times so the FBI would read us. Hi boys!
Anyway, have some new poems by debut ar-teeste Chad Robertson on our words
page. And photos? Are you shitting me? We've got new photos
coming out our asses!! We're like some kind of rectal photoshop over here! It's like
a freakin' fecal fax machine! A colonic Kodak! A ... um, like a ...
Well, anyway, we've got a lot of photos.
8/7/02 ... Someone please shut us up
You'd better take an extra hour for lunch, worker drone. Draw the curtains around your
cubicle and let the Backroom Words take you away to a special place where the fax machines
print out candy paper and bluebirds perch singing on the arm of every desk lamp. Just dance
gaily over to our words page and read all sorts of brand new, uplifting tripe
from the likes of Butch, Dith, Jeff, and the mighty Rhoade.
Then get back to work. That data ain't gonna collate itself, you know.
7/17/02 ... Vacation! The Backroom Words is goin' to Disneyland!
On Monday the 22nd, where are you gonna be? No, not at Will's Pub for the Backroom
Words. The Words will be taking the week off, so don't go. I mean, it's a free country. Go
if you wanna, but a punk band will be onstage and they will kick your scrawny poet ass. We
will, however, be back the very next week, so save your brain cells and wallow in our new
links. You're welcome.
7/16/02 ... Old News
We know. We told you there were new photos and new flyers
up last time. But we lied. We only said that to get
you into bed. This time we mean it, though! Really, baby! Check it out. Aw, now who's
your daddy ...
This just in! Global advertising campaign scheduled for local poetry night!
See what happens when you put out a bucket and don't let people puke in it? The Backroom
Words collected $20 last Monday for use on flyers and other unsavory things. But it's not enough, damn it!
Bring more alms for the poor and help us cover the world with our witchy corporate logo!
Guess we oughta get one of those ...
7/09/02 ... Older news
24 hours after last week's edition of the Backroom Words and we're still sore. The ranks of Orlando's wannabe poets continue to grow, with 12-some-odd poets signing up to get down.
Belated thanks to Jim Criger, who has been providing the night with superb quality sound for the last month or so. Thanks, Jim. Don't leave.
If you missed the party, don't despair. There are new examples of poetry in our words
section from Donna, Butch, Celestine, and Tod. Just kick back while reading with a beer in hand
and have your roommate repeatedly flush the toilet in the background ... it's almost like you were actually there!
Next week, donate to the cause as we collect your spare rupee (that's money, rube) to buy some much-needed advertising. We give
and we give and we don't ask much, dammit. Besides, whatever's left over we can drink.
7/03/02 ... Good God, man. This happened months ago. Page up already.
Welcome to the Backroom Words shiny new website.
Smile for the camera implanted in your head. Ogle the site
as long as you like, but don't get drool on it ...
we just cleaned the damn thing. There's new flyers, new photos,
new words, new reasons to live, and more guaranteed pop-ups than any other
site! Hot damn! It's a work in progress, and probably will be for awhile,
so get off our nuts already.
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